Living Elitist In Small-Town America
Posted on 08.25.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 10:39 pm

Amy Hinds, a teacher in Missouri, the author of the blog Living Single in Small-Town America, and a talented photographer, fancies herself a teacher. But by my reading of her latest blog entry, “Really … I Don’t Hate Rednecks,” she has much to learn, too.

It’s clear from the title and lighthearted tone of of Hinds’ essay that she’s not as hostile as most people who make a sport of mocking rednecks these days. But she has an elitist streak that is blinding her to who we rednecks really are.

A stubborn embrace of the Confederate flag does not a redneck make. Neither are sexism nor a contempt for English class the exclusive domain of rednecks. Plenty of highly educated men are chauvinist pigs who can’t write or speak coherently, and whose idea of a good book is the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.

Ironically, Hinds plans to use her own redneck past to better connect with her students:

I am going to talk about growing up on a big farm, doing lots of farm chores, and how I still basically live on a farm. I’m going to tell my crazy stories about wild animals getting into my house and my having to shoot things like possums and raccoons. I’m going to put pictures I’ve taken of our farm (animals, equipment, etc.) and my niece and nephews dressed up in John Deere and hanging out on the farm as my screen saver for my school computer. Often, my screen saver is projected on the board, so they will see the pictures.

It’s a smart move on her part. Hopefully she’ll learn as much about rednecks this year as they learn from her. It sounds like they all need a good education.


Filed under: Grammar and Hatin' On Rednecks and People and Rednecks
Comments: None

The Singing Candidate
Posted on 08.25.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 9:42 pm

Chris Young, a Democrat who wants to be mayor of Providence, R.I., proved himself to be both politically and literally tone deaf in an appearance on a local television program.

Put that in the category of “things not to do if you want to be elected.” But he may have a future in the ridicule round of “America’s Got Talent” or “American Idol.”


Filed under: Just For Laughs and News & Politics and People and Video
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Country Roads Lead To WVU, Not Marshall
Posted on 08.23.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 10:43 pm

Bad things happen when rednecks “think outside the box” — bad things like Marshall University’s band ending its tradition of playing “Take Me Home, Country Roads” at the behest of unenlightened Athletic Director Mike Hamrick:

Hamrick, who is beginning his second year at Marshall, said the university wanted to go a different direction because of all of the changes being made at the stadium. New video scoreboards and an updated sound system are a few components of the $3 million athletic facilities overhaul that fans will notice next month.

“We’re changing our approach to the game presentation,” Hamrick said. “We want to put together a new concept for the presentation, and ‘Country Roads’ is just not part of that new concept.”

Taking “a different direction” than “Country Roads” in West Virginia is like traveling the wrong way on a one-way street. Marshall has gone to the dark side, giving West Virginia University alumni like me yet another reason to despise the Thundering Herd.

But that’s OK because no band performs “Country Roads” better than WVU’s band. Now the master musicians in the Pride of West Virginia will have the tune all to themselves. I hope they play it with an extra dose of passion when we beat Marshall on the Thundering Herd’s home field come Sept. 11.


Filed under: Music and News & Politics and People and Redneck Music and Sports and West Virginia
Comments: None

VRE Confessional
Posted on 08.20.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 6:25 pm

Truer words about Virginia Railway Express were never spoken than these by VRE chief executive Dale Zehner in the latest “Train Talk” e-mail distributed yesterday: “This summer has been a difficult one for VRE staff and riders alike.”

In a span of less than two months, I earned seven free-ride certificates because of lengthy VRE delays. Two were the result of train breakdowns ahead of the one I was riding and a third was caused by a power failure on my train. Flash-flood warnings forced VRE to putt along at about five miles an hour during two other commutes. I’ve forgotten what caused the other two delays.

All but two of the delays occurred in the evenings, so they seriously cut into my family time during the week. All told, I lost more than seven hours of my life, basically an extra work day, because VRE couldn’t get its act together.

Before all the troubles started, I was a VRE fan; now I’m a perpetual critic of the system, on this blog, Facebook and my Twitter account (@Danny_Glover). I hope Zehner was serious when he wrote this:

Don’t think for a second that I take your loyalty for granted, because I don’t. No one at VRE does. You are the driving force for what we do here at VRE. I pledge to you that VRE is determined to make improvements, earn back your trust in us to get you to work and home, safely and on-time.

VRE already has lost my loyalty — the only reason I’m still riding is because I’d lose at least twice as many hours of my life driving into Washington or to the Metro every day — and it definitely will have to earn my trust again.


Filed under: Business and D.C. Commuter Diary and People
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Deserted With Barack Obama
Posted on 08.20.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 12:10 pm

I like the way Tim Carney thinks. The newly promoted senior political columnist at the Washington Examiner had this to say when the media blog FishbowlDC asked, in its lighthearted interview series, who he would want as his lone companion on a desert island:

Barack Obama — because then Barack Obama would be trapped on a desert island. Nothing personal, but this could slow the growth of government. Also, the military would try to find us.

And here’s another great Carney quip from the interview: “When and why did you last laugh so hard you had tears in your eyes? When I asked my 3-year-old the president’s name, and she answered ‘Big Government.’”

It’s pretty clear that Carney talks politics in front of his kids as much as I do. Mine like to buy me Obama knick-knacks as gag gifts. I cherish them all because it’s the humorous thought that counts.


Filed under: Blogging and Government and Just For Laughs and Media and News & Politics and People
Comments: None

How To Write Like A Purebred Elitist
Posted on 08.17.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 9:53 pm

Tom Harper, the writer of a blog called Who Hijacked Our Country from Olympic Peninsula, Wash., just submitted his entry for elitist of the year:

Let’s just pretend for a minute: Your parents are first cousins, you flunked out of school in first grade because finger-painting was too complicated, and your favorite hobby is pulling the wings off of flies. And now, one of your fellow retards has asked you and a hundred of your closest friends for your opinion.

Sadly, juvenile, name-calling tirades against rednecks like his are all too common in political circles. This tweet captures the spirit of the left perfectly: “The Democrats have selected their motto for the midterms: ‘Vote for us, you racist, hate-filled morons!’”


Filed under: Hatin' On Rednecks and News & Politics and People
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Obama Stage Left, Exit Stage Right
Posted on 08.17.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 8:32 pm

Little good can come from the recent obsession with a bratty JetBlue steward who quit his job by making an illegal emergency exit onto the tarmac. But it did give America this clever animated video of congressional Democrats fleeing Air Force One to escape any association with President Obama:



Filed under: Just For Laughs and News & Politics and People and Video
Comments: None

Why Elderly Politicians Shouldn’t Dance
Posted on 08.12.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 6:16 pm

This is Rep. Charles Rangel, D-N.Y., proving at his birthday bash/fundraiser that he is as rhythmically challenged as he is ethically challenged:


Filed under: Just For Laughs and News & Politics and People and Video
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How To Quit Your Job — Or Not
Posted on 08.12.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 12:26 am

Serious news is rarer in the dog days of summer, so journalists fill their pages, pixels and airtime with silly stories. This week’s big news: An airline steward quit his job.

Here’s a sample of the praise being heaped upon the man who brought to life the message of “Take This Job And Shove It“:

I’ve got no problem with JetBlue flight attendant Steven Slater grabbing a cold brewski before popping the disaster slide on Flight 1052 and kissing his airline career goodbye. In fact, the guy is a hero.

That’s right, act like a child and commit a crime in the act of quitting your job and you, too, can be a global hero.

Or how about this spin? “It’s refreshing when someone decides to flourish his way out of a job instead of taking the now-cliche mass-murder suicide route.” Have we sunk so low that the only two options for quitting a job are mass murder and obnoxious, self-indulgent behavior?

I behaved that way once. The band director in high school rightly scolded a few classmates and me for talking out of turn on the field at the end of practice. I had been ready to quit band at the start of that season anyway and was surprised and embarrassed by the lecture. So when the band director publicly invited any of us who couldn’t stop talking to leave and not come back, I walked.

I thought I was so cool at the time. A few of my classmates did, too. But most of them knew what I refused to see until years later when I recounted the story to my wife and she enlightened me as to what I really had been: a stupid 17-year-old kid and a disrespectful punk.
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Filed under: Culture and Human Interest and Media and News & Politics and People and Pets and Sports and Video
Comments: 1 Comment

A Valedictorian Educates Her Educators
Posted on 08.08.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 8:47 pm

Last month at Coxsackie-Athens High School in Coxsackie, N.Y., an 18-year-old girl who rose to the top of her graduating class embraced her valedictory speech as an opportunity to deliver a pointed message to the educational system that molded her.

“School is not all that it can be,” Erica Goldson told her teachers and school administrators, her peers and their parents. “Right now, it is a place for most people to determine that their goal is to get out as soon as possible.” Her speech has created a minor buzz online.

I don’t agree with every gripe Goldson voiced. Most children need educational goals to excel, and tests are the best way to gauge student progress toward those goals. Based on the awkward delivery (see the video below), I also doubt that Goldson spoke from her own inspiration. I suspect that an adult who hates authority, structure and the “evil corporate world” unduly influenced her.

But as a whole, her speech is worth a read. Here are some of the high points:

  • I cannot say that I am any more intelligent than my peers. I can attest that I am only the best at doing what I am told and working the system. … I did what I was told to the extreme.
  • I excelled at every subject just for the purpose of excelling, not learning. And quite frankly, now I’m scared.
  • Between these cinderblock walls, we are all expected to be the same. We are trained to ace every standardized test, and those who deviate and see light through a different lens are worthless to the scheme of public education, and therefore viewed with contempt.
  • Our motivational force ought to be passion, but this is lost from the moment we step into a system that trains us, rather than inspires us.
  • We are thinkers, dreamers, explorers, artists, writers, engineers. We are anything we want to be — but only if we have an educational system that supports us rather than holds us down. A tree can grow, but only if its roots are given a healthy foundation.


Filed under: Business and Culture and Home Schooling and News & Politics and People and Video
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Votes From The Crypt
Posted on 07.15.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 12:13 am

It’s a good thing for Harry Reid that Nevadans don’t vote in the after life.

It’s a bad thing for the Democratic leader in the U.S. Senate that newspapers let family members write whatever they want in paid obituaries. He awoke to this one in memory of 84-year-old Charlotte McCourt, a former Reid supporter:

We believe that Mom would say she was mortified to have taken a large role in the election of Harry Reid to U.S. Congress. Let the record show Charlotte was displeased with his work. Please, in lieu of flowers, vote for another more worthy candidate.

Something tells me there’s a strong current of enlightened redneck blood in the McCourt family history — that and an ornery streak a mile long.

John Smith, a writer for the Las Vegas Review-Journal, said this after seeing the obit: “It’s the kind of small story that has the potential to ricochet like a bullet through the campaign showdown between incumbent Reid and Republican challenger Sharron Angle.”

If Angle is smart, she’ll feature the obit prominently in her campaign ads and find ways to remind voters of it at every opportunity.


Filed under: Just For Laughs and Media and News & Politics and People
Comments: None

The Spin-And-Run Cycle
Posted on 07.14.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 11:29 pm

My office neighborhood is an eccentric place. I discovered the first oddity, the bizarre sculpture art lining the median in front of our building, on Day One.

A few weeks later, my colleagues started telling inside jokes about a guy who spins and squawks as he runs down the street. You had to see it to believe it — and eventually I did.

Little did I know then that I could have seen it on the Internet. So can you:

Yes, Cedric Givens, the crazy jogger, spins, squawks and runs on busy streets in the heart of the nation’s capital — and drivers pay him no mind as they buzz by in all directions (see more videos here). He’s been doing it for years.

How is Cedric still alive, and why do the police let him do what he does? If jaywalking is a crime, his dangerous hobby has to be illegal. It just goes to show that if you’re eccentric enough, the nanny state will look the other way when you’re acting as crazy as a loon.


Filed under: Human Interest and People and Video
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Lebron and Da’Sean
Posted on 07.10.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 10:18 am

It was mildly amusing yesterday to see the different, and often hysterical, reactions to the biggest news event of the week — Lebron James’ decision to leave the Cleveland Cavaliers for the “greener” NBA grass in Miami.

Cleveland went ballistic over what it saw as a betrayal. The city’s newspaper, The Plain Dealer, dedicated its front page to a full-length photo of Lebron and this biting commentary: “Gone. 7 years in Cleveland. No rings.” What a bunch of “homers“!

Bitterness ruled the day in Chicago and New York, cities that Lebron rejected as his new basketball home. And Miami celebrated the anointing of a new sports king.

Lebron fever even hit the hills of my home state, West Virginia. The reason: A couple of weeks before Lebron decided to go to Miami, the Heat drafted West Virginia University all-star Da’Sean Butler. So if Butler makes the team, he could be playing with not only Lebron James but also Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh, two other NBA all-stars headed for Miami.
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Filed under: News & Politics and People and Photography and Sports and West Virginia
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‘West Virginia On My Heart’
Posted on 07.03.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 12:26 pm

West Virginia remembered Sen. Robert C. Byrd at a state Capitol service in the great Mountain State yesterday, and Mark Knoller of CBS tweeted one of the moments that will stick with me:

“He once said, ‘When I am dead and opened, they will find West Virginia on my heart,’” GOP Sen. Mitch McConnell said of Byrd.

That much Byrd and I have in common. West Virginia will forever be on my heart. (The words also were etched into postcard-sized memorial photos of Byrd.)

The other moment from the memorial that moved me, literally almost to tears, is when a bluegrass band started playing “Country Roads” and the crowd sang the lyrics to John Denver’s famous song while the honor guard carried Byrd’s casket back into the Capitol.

I can’t hear that song without getting chills. I love my home, and no matter how long I live in the Washington, D.C., area or anywhere else, I’ll always be a proud hillbilly from West Virginia.


Filed under: Music and News & Politics and People and Redneck Music and Rednecks and West Virginia
Comments: None

RIP, ‘Big Daddy’ Bobby Byrd
Posted on 07.01.10 by K. Daniel Glover @ 11:24 pm

The Senate lost its heart and soul this week. Robert Byrd, a constitutional scholar and good ol’ boy from West Virginia coal country, died after serving in the Senate for more than a half-century — longer than anyone in history. He was the epitome of an enlightened redneck.

Byrd, who was 92, made one last appearance on the Senate floor today. An honor guard carried his body into the chamber to lie in state. It was the first time since 1959, the year Byrd was first elected to the Senate, that senators had paid tribute to one of their own in such fashion.

Politically, I was not a Byrd man. I never voted for him when I lived in the great Mountain State, and I detest to this day the pork-barrel politics he mastered. Money is the most corrupting influence in politics, and pork too often is all about rewarding political allies with taxpayers’ money.

But I always respected Byrd for his love of family, his commitment to the Constitution, his eloquent defenses of the legislative branch in general and the Senate in particular, and his passion for the state we both love. Robert C. Byrd was a statesman with an expensive soft spot for West Virginia, and while I wish the practice of earmarking federal funds would die with the “King of Pork,” I forgive him that flaw.

Rest in peace, “Big Daddy.”


Filed under: Government and History and News & Politics and People and Video and West Virginia
Comments: 1 Comment

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