|
Posted on 11.05.09 by Danny Glover @ 5:40 pm
So says Barbara Henderson at the religious Web site Prophezine. Here’s a partial list of what it means to be a redneck from her article:
I have a running list of my own thoughts in the entry “What Is An Enlightened Redneck?” The category “Hatin’ On Rednecks” is another place to go for my reactions to redneck hate in America. It includes a recent rebuttal to an essay by Dallas Morning News writer Rod Dreher. Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Hatin' On Rednecks and Rednecks Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 11.05.09 by Danny Glover @ 1:56 pm
That’s the setting of the new video for the song “Hillbilly Bone,” by country singers Trace Adkins and Blake Shelton: I despise the video’s emphasis on booze and drunkenness, but I love the underlying message of the song: “We all got a hillbilly bone down deep inside. No matter where you’re from, you just can’t hide it.” It echoes the theme of this blog as captured in the conclusion to my essay “Rednecks Rule“:
Filed under: Music and People and Redneck Music and Redneck Musical Interlude and Rednecks and Video Comments: None |
|
Posted on 10.31.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:39 pm
My father e-mailed me a bunch of pictures under the headline above. I searched the title on Google and found this slide show on CNN. Dad’s e-mail had more pictures, but the ability to embed the slide show makes this presentation more user-friendly for a blog. The message: Enlightened rednecks appreciate good art. Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Business and Culture and Just For Laughs and Photography and Redneck Humor Comments: 4 Comments |
|
Posted on 10.28.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:08 pm
A friend posted this ad to Facebook, and it put me in the mood for Nutella. My wife restocked at Costco today, so I had Nutella for supper: I had never heard of Nutella until friends from church who had spent a few years in Italy introduced it to me after Sunday lunch. It was dessert. I’ve been hooked ever since. But like all enlightened rednecks, I eat my Nutella with peanut butter. It’s the perfect blend of America and Europe — like a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup on bread. Europeans like the stuffy dude in the ad don’t know what they’re missing. Filed under: Advertising and An Enlightened Redneck ... and Food and Media and Video Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 10.10.09 by Danny Glover @ 12:47 pm
Don Surber of the Charleston Daily Mail peers into the future and imagines how the historians of tomorrow will recount today’s misguided obsession with global warming that isn’t even real:
‘Round these parts, we call those folks enlightened rednecks. We just laugh at people who spend millions of dollars to drown animated puppies in a quest to convince us to believe a lie.   
Filed under: Advertising and An Enlightened Redneck ... and History and News & Politics and Pets and Rednecks Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 08.24.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:56 pm
Country singer Billy Carrington has a hit song whose lyrics include the phrase “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.” I’d like to amend that statement with a dose of enlightenment: God is great, beer is crud, and rednecks would be a lot less crazy if they quit drinking booze. In case it isn’t obvious by now, this enlightened redneck is a teetotaler. I know it’s hard to believe. If there’s one thing people associate with rednecks, it’s liquor — from the hard stuff (Jack Daniels) to the soft stuff (pick a beer) to the illegal, homemade stuff (moonshine). But it’s all bad news, if you ask me. On second thought, don’t ask me. Just listen to the lyrics of Brad Paisley’s hit song “Alcohol,” which perfectly captures the idiocy that ensues after alcohol consumption. Here are some of Paisley’s pearls of wisdom:
I loved the song when it was released on the radio. Then I saw the video and realized that despite the honesty of the lyrics, Paisley intended the song as a celebration of alcohol-induced foolishness. That’s too bad because rednecks really know how to have a good time without help from Jim Beam and the rest of the Inebriation Clan. But enlightened rednecks like me — I’ve lived 42 years on this planet without once drinking for business or pleasure — don’t get to share in those good times because they aren’t family-friendly venues. Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Culture and Music and People and Redneck Music and Rednecks and West Virginia Comments: 3 Comments |
|
Posted on 08.23.09 by Danny Glover @ 9:03 pm
I returned to my redneck roots for one week this summer, serving as a counselor at Camp Appalachia in West Virginia, near my hometown. It’s not a “church camp,” but it is run by Christians and emphasizes wholesome living and wholesome fun. We have daily Bible classes and devotionals, in addition to sports activities and recreational classes that run the gamut from crafts and chorus to archery and riflery. I attended Camp Appalachia in the late 1970s and early 1980s during its first few years. I loved the experience then and even more this year as an adult. I taught two fishing classes and a session on photography. The highlight of the fishing classes was forcing the students, girls and boys alike, to make “stink bait” so we could try to catch some catfish. I figured that was less of a liability than making them go “noodling.” The highlight of the photography class was seeing my students put the simple lessons we studied into action as we wandered around the campground each day. They took some truly artistic shots, which I plan to post here eventually. I knew the campers and other counselors had as much fun as I did, so on the final morning of camp, I asked them to explain why, for the benefit of future campers and counselors. This is a video montage of their answers: I loved Camp Appalachia because the campers chose me as “the counselor who was the most fun to be around.” For a man who was called a curmudgeon by a colleague at the ripe, young age of 25, that award was an utter shock to me. I’m sure the stink bait put me over the top. Filed under: Family and Friends and People and Religion and Sports and The Redneck Report and Video and West Virginia Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 07.10.09 by Danny Glover @ 7:06 pm
I heard Brad Paisley’s new song “Welcome To The Future” on the radio for the first time this evening and couldn’t wait to get home to see if I could find a version to post to the blog. Here’s what I found: I hope Paisley, who will be performing near us on July 25, releases an official music video soon. The storyline is made for video. Paisley is one of my favorite musicians. He’s just a few years younger than me, and his hometown (Glen Dale, W.Va.) is about a half-hour from mine (Paden City). I love songs like “I’m Gonna Miss Her,” “I’m Still A Guy,” “Letter To Me,” “Mud On The Tires” and “Ticks,” because they remind me of my youth in the great Mountain State. “Welcome To The Future” reminds me of how blessed I am to be living when “every day is a revolution.” I especially love the closing verse:
That allusion to how far America has come in race relations in the past 50 years was even more powerful because it was totally unexpected after the lighthearted and technologically oriented lyrics of the first two verses. Filed under: History and Human Interest and Music and People and Redneck Music and Redneck Musical Interlude and West Virginia Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 07.01.09 by Danny Glover @ 6:52 pm
An enlightened redneck does not pay someone to inject saline into his head in the shape of a bagel, but apparently they call that “beauty” in Japan these days.
Before you decide to have breakfast in head, remember what that Belgian teenager said after she had 56 stars tattooed on her face: “I cannot go out on to the street, I am so embarrassed. I just look ugly, a freak, mutilated.” Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Human Interest and Just For Laughs Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 06.26.09 by Danny Glover @ 6:57 pm
I hate cabbies in the District of Columbia who think they have some special exemption that lets them occupy two lanes by straddling the dotted white line as they drive. And someone needs to pass a law that makes rush hour illegal at 1:30 in the afternoon. I also don’t understand why I can save 10 cents to 20 cents a gallon by traveling just a few blocks. All stations are selling the exact same fossil fuel, and the overhead can’t vary that much from one spot to the next in the same county, with the same property taxes, etc. That’s all for today. Tune in next week for the latest installment of “The D.C. Commuter’s Rant.” Filed under: Culture and Redneck Rants Comments: None |
|
Posted on 06.17.09 by Danny Glover @ 9:26 am
You’ve heard the phrase “scarred for life.” That’s what I think of tattoos. Enlightened rednecks, not old squares, want nothing to do with them. We know that one day, perhaps sooner than expected, a tattooed body would make us say something like this: “I cannot go out on to the street, I am so embarrassed. I just look ugly, a freak, mutilated.” Too bad that teenage girl didn’t think about that before she decided to let the “freak” in the video scar her body for life. I’m with Don Surber — the tattoo artist’s side of the story is way more believable. There’s no way someone sleeps while getting 56 stars burned into the skin of her face. Plus a mere three stars would have made her look freaky. Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Human Interest and Parenting and Video Comments: 4 Comments |
|
Posted on 06.04.09 by Danny Glover @ 8:32 am
It looks nothing like a skunk on the run because of the graininess, poor lighting and reasonable distance from the animal, but here it is:
Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... Comments: 1 Comment |
|
Posted on 05.02.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:11 pm
Outrage and insights in a 140 characters or less (most of the time). This is a weekly recap of topics that capture my fancy. To get your fill of my rants on a daily basis, follow The Enlightened Redneck on Twitter. Hateful liberals who want everyone to tolerate homosexuality but who won’t tolerate anyone disagreeing with them are on the attack against Miss California Carrie Prejean for daring to say, when asked a direct question, that she opposes gay marriage. Their complaint is that Prejean opposes gay marriage on moral grounds even as she prances around virtually nude on stage and strikes alluring poses as a model. It’s a wee bit morally inconsistent, they argue. Conservatives, including the “family values” crowd, have been quick to dismiss the criticism of Prejean, but the liberals have a point. Yes, they are attacking her for political reasons and don’t care one lick about morality unless they see an opening to yell, “Hypocrite!” But Christians shouldn’t bare their bodies for everyone to see. I said as much, repeatedly, on Twitter this week. Here are my tweets on the subject, some of them written in response to fellow conservatives who scolded me for suggesting that Prejean needs to take the moral high road in her attire and behavior as well as in her views about gay marriage: Filed under: Redneck Rants Comments: None |
|
Posted on 04.25.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:28 am
Outrage and insights in a 140 characters or less (most of the time). This is a weekly recap of topics that capture my fancy. To get your fill of my rants on a daily basis, follow The Enlightened Redneck on Twitter.
Filed under: Redneck Rants Comments: None |
|
Posted on 04.20.09 by Danny Glover @ 8:47 pm
No guy, redneck or otherwise, wants a “shotgun wedding.” But every real man would love to have a shotgun romance with an enlightened redneck woman like this:
I’ll bet she even wears jeans. (Hat tip to Instapundit) Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Human Interest and Hunting & Guns and Photography and Rednecks Comments: 3 Comments |
| « newer posts | previous posts » |
