Lifestyles Of The Rich And Redneck
Posted on 06.09.14 by Danny Glover @ 8:37 am

About 15 miles north of downtown Atlanta, just inside the Interstate 285 loop that encircles the metropolitan area, there’s a mansion that screams enlightened redneck.

The enlightened features include:

  • European gated estate totaling 7,000 square feet on nearly two acres;
  • Two-story foyer with a marble floor and elegant staircase;
  • Living room with a cathedral ceiling and limestone kitchen counter;
  • Master bedroom (one of seven) with a fireplace and a spa bathroom;
  • Rooms galore for dining, recreation and more;
  • And a fireplace, heated in-ground pool, spa and gazebo outside.

Now for the redneck rooms of the estate, located in a separate “two-story entertainment building.” These two pictures from the Coldwell Banker listing are worth any 2,000 words I could muster to describe the rooms:

For a cool $1.499 million, this home in Sandy Springs can be yours. But the collection of stuffed animals doesn’t appear to be part of the package.

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Culture and Hunting & Guns and Rednecks and Wildlife
Comments: 1 Comment

Redneck Artistry In Action
Posted on 04.21.13 by Danny Glover @ 11:26 pm

This is how you make a masterpiece, redneck style:

My wife watched the video with me and wants to buy me one of the paintings, especially once she realized the artist, Heather LaCroix, is from Louisiana.

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Culture and Family and Features and Human Interest and Media and Parenting and People and Rednecks and Video
Comments: None

Sticking It To The HOA Man
Posted on 12.24.11 by Danny Glover @ 6:27 pm

I decided long ago never to buy a home on property controlled by an association of nib-noses who love to impose elitist rules on others. As an enlightened being, I don’t decorate our property with tire planters or cars jacked up on blocks, but the redneck in me cherishes the freedom to do so.

That’s why I like to see people who do choose to live within developments managed by homeowners associations stick it to the HOA man when he goes on a ridiculous and unjustifiable power trip. Overbearing rules usually have loopholes that are ripe for exploitation.

A Facebook friend found just such a loophole during the holidays when her HOA decided to play Grinch. Her understated Christmas decorations — two red bows on the porch pillars and lanterns in the lawn — apparently violated the letter of the association’s lame laws about “seasonal decorations.” The HOA ordered her to remove them.

She didn’t face any fines for the alleged breach, so she decided to keep the decorations in place. But the warning letter from the HOA irritated her and her husband so much that they decided to protest by also decorating their car in Christmas lights. “There is NOTHING in the rules prohibiting decorating your car with Christmas lights,” she said.

Take that, HOA!

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Business and Culture and Family and Features and Holidays and Parenting and Photoshop Stop
Comments: None

Rep. Paul Ryan, Deer Slayer
Posted on 11.23.11 by Danny Glover @ 6:35 pm

During the legislative season, Paul Ryan is a budget geek in Congress. But when hunting season comes, he’s a whitetail wonk and a sharpshooter in the wilds of Wisconsin.

The proof is in this picture that Ryan, R-Wis., posted to his Facebook page today:

“I butcher my own deer, grind the meat, stuff it in casings and then smoke it,” Ryan told Politico. “Not much to it.”

That, my friends, is an enlightened redneck.

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Government and Hunting & Guns and People and Photography and Rednecks and Wildlife
Comments: 4 Comments

Insider Trading In Journalism
Posted on 02.10.10 by Danny Glover @ 6:11 pm

Thinking outside the media box is dangerous. Media companies need to be forward-thinking and both willing and able to adapt quickly if they hope to survive and thrive in a changing marketplace. But thinking unconventionally may lead to behaving unscrupulously.

The proof is in this new and utterly unethical media business model:

IBusiness Reporting plans to report on companies that may be engaging in fraudulent practices (kinda like the ones Minkow engaged in way back when) and fund its reporting through shortselling the stocks of those companies. If the stock price drops after the outlet reports negative information about the company, IBR makes money.

Let’s say that again. There are no ads on the site. No endowments. Nothing of the sort. When one of IBR’s staff, who has taken the position that such-and-such stock will go down, reports information that makes the stock go down, IBR makes money.

One man behind the operation, Barry Minkow, went to jail for orchestrating a Ponzi scheme, so his willingness to cross the boundaries of ethical behavior is no surprise. But Los Angeles Times reporter William Lobdell, who should know better than to engage in such conflicts of interest, is running iBusiness Reporting. His involvement tarnishes the reputation of journalism.

IBR’s business model is a perverted form of insider trading. IBR is buying stocks in companies with the intent of making money by driving down share values. Hopefully, this scheme will be short-lived.

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ...
Comments: None

Guide To Good Wives (And Husbands)
Posted on 11.30.09 by Danny Glover @ 7:45 pm

An article titled “The Good Wife’s Guide,” purportedly from a 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly, has made its way into e-mail lore more than 50 years after it was written.

The piece offers tips to wives’ on how to satisfy their husbands, such as “have dinner ready,” “greet him with a warm smile” and “make the evening his.”

The graphic accompanying the list has been exposed as a fake, and the list itself is suspect, but it continues to inspire commentary. It even inspired a video spoof back in 2006.

The latest response, which assumes the list is real, offers a counterpoint “Good Husband’s Guide” that theoretically could have been written during the same era. The tips include:

  • Always make getting and keeping a full-time job with regular raises, benefits, bonuses and the potential for prestigious advancement your number one priority in life.
  • Be prepared to help with household chores when you get home. Let your wife relax or talk on the phone.
  • Do not bore your wife with stories of the troubles you faced at work today. Remember that you are lucky to have a job.
  • Listen avidly to your wife’s complaints. She leads a hectic life and needs to feel listened to and appreciated.
  • Always be prepared to take over in caring for the children when you get home from work. Your wife has been busy all day and deserves some quiet time.

The moral to the story: “The first list is outdated and laughable in its attitudes toward women; the second list, however, could be printed today since every single sentiment expressed in it is practiced, believed and upheld by modern wives and by the culture at large.”

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ...
Comments: None

Rednecks Are The Backbone Of America
Posted on 11.05.09 by Danny Glover @ 5:40 pm

So says Barbara Henderson at the religious Web site Prophezine. Here’s a partial list of what it means to be a redneck from her article:

  • Redneck is really just a general term for a group of fine hardworking people. Generally speaking, rednecks have a tremendous sense of humor. They can take a joke, even when it is on them. That is one of the reasons the “You might be a redneck if …” jokes go over so well. Rednecks love to laugh. They know laughter is a strong medicine.
  • Rednecks prefer to look at the world through laughter instead of through self pity.
  • Rednecks do not live within the boundaries of perpetual victimhood.
  • Rednecks are risk-takers, preferring to think outside the box of “socially acceptable behavior.”
    Rednecks have a very strong sense of right and wrong, based on the Biblical definitions of right and wrong.

I have a running list of my own thoughts in the entry “What Is An Enlightened Redneck?

The category “Hatin’ On Rednecks” is another place to go for my reactions to redneck hate in America. It includes a recent rebuttal to an essay by Dallas Morning News writer Rod Dreher.

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Hatin' On Rednecks and Rednecks
Comments: 2 Comments

When Farm Kids Get Bored
Posted on 10.31.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:39 pm

My father e-mailed me a bunch of pictures under the headline above. I searched the title on Google and found this slide show on CNN. Dad’s e-mail had more pictures, but the ability to embed the slide show makes this presentation more user-friendly for a blog.

The message: Enlightened rednecks appreciate good art.

Filed under: An Enlightened Redneck ... and Business and Culture and Just For Laughs and Photography and Redneck Humor
Comments: 4 Comments

Nuts For Nutella
Posted on 10.28.09 by Danny Glover @ 10:08 pm

A friend posted this ad to Facebook, and it put me in the mood for Nutella. My wife restocked at Costco today, so I had Nutella for supper:

I had never heard of Nutella until friends from church who had spent a few years in Italy introduced it to me after Sunday lunch. It was dessert. I’ve been hooked ever since.

But like all enlightened rednecks, I eat my Nutella with peanut butter. It’s the perfect blend of America and Europe — like a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup on bread. Europeans like the stuffy dude in the ad don’t know what they’re missing.

Filed under: Advertising and An Enlightened Redneck ... and Food and Media and Video
Comments: 1 Comment

The Hoax That Was Global Warming
Posted on 10.10.09 by Danny Glover @ 12:47 pm

Don Surber of the Charleston Daily Mail peers into the future and imagines how the historians of tomorrow will recount today’s misguided obsession with global warming that isn’t even real:

I can see it in the year 3000: “Ancient man had a superstition that burning coal warmed not only the fire but the entire planet. This was widespread and only a few people pointed out that nature comes in cycles. They were called heretics and ridiculed as illiterate, Bible-thumping, gun-clinging, racist, inbred, mouth-breathing, redneck conservatives who are an embarrassment to the Republican Party.”

‘Round these parts, we call those folks enlightened rednecks. We just laugh at people who spend millions of dollars to drown animated puppies in a quest to convince us to believe a lie.

Filed under: Advertising and An Enlightened Redneck ... and History and News & Politics and Pets and Rednecks
Comments: 1 Comment

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