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Posted on 03.07.13 by Danny Glover @ 12:55 am
Newsflash! Newsman Brian Williams has a touch of redneck in him. The “NBC Nightly News” anchor is a spam-eater from way back and still likes Ramen noodles.
Spam and eggs, now that’s a meal. I’m not so sure about the Spam sushi Savannah Guthrie of NBC’s “Today” admitted to eating, but I’d probably be willing to give it or any other number of Spam recipes a try. That’s what being enlightened is all about. Filed under: Food and News & Politics and People and Rednecks Comments: None |
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Posted on 11.16.12 by Danny Glover @ 11:58 am
Get your Ding Dongs, Twinkies and Wonder Bread while you still can because once the store shelves in your area are empty, they won’t be restocked with any tasty goods made by Hostess Brands. The company has closed its plants and is liquidating because of a labor strike and union demands that made future operations for the bankrupt company impossible. Don’t bother trying to visit Hostess websites to refresh your memory about which sweet snacks the company makes, either. All websites were blank this morning, save for a “Not Found” error message. The labor standoff will cost 18,500 employees their jobs and will deprive rednecks everywhere of a future filled with deep-fried hunks of trans fat and sugar. Filed under: Business and Food Comments: None |
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Posted on 11.12.12 by Danny Glover @ 9:59 pm
Marcé briefly believed his small business was doomed in the summer when the Spanish government hiked taxes on tickets to plays by 21 percent. But then he had a carrot-inspired epiphany: Sell produce in exchange for free movie tickets. “We sell one carrot, which costs 13 euros [$16] -– very expensive for a carrot, But then we give away admission to our shows for free,” Marcé told NPR. “So we end up paying 4 percent tax on the carrot, rather than 21 percent, which is the government’s new tax rate for theater tickets.” It’s a clever way to stick it to Tío Sam and to generate publicity for the theater. But tax hikers undoubtedly won’t let it stand. One Spanish economist quoted in the NPR story called it “tax evasion.” “This means that people who do pay taxes have to pay a larger tax,” Fernando Fernandez said. “And this makes it more difficult to get the fiscal target. So we have to denounce this just as much as we denounce the filthy rich who don’t want to pay taxes. We should do the same.” Filed under: Business and Entertainment and Food and Government and Human Interest and News & Politics Comments: None |
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Posted on 09.11.12 by Danny Glover @ 12:47 pm
For the record, Vice President Joe Biden did not invite a biker lady to sit on his lap. He did the gentlemanly thing and pulled up a chair so she could get her picture taken with him. A smart photographer captured the candid moments after the posed picture, and people on Twitter started a rumor about something that didn’t happen the way they saw it.
Sadly, I fell for the Twitter hype about the photo. I’m glad to have heard the rest of the story. Also for the record, pizza entrepreneur Scott Van Duzer did hug President Obama during a campaign trip to Van Duzer’s Florida restaurant — and people are protesting the pizza shop over the hug. Obama haters flocked to the website Yelp to give Big Apple Pizza negative reviews for political rather than culinary reasons.
As an American, I support people’s right to register any political protest they desire, but I also reserve my right to expose some such antics for what they are — petty politics. Van Duzer, a Republican who voted for Obama in 2008 and plans to do so again, is right: “There’s no middle line anymore, and that’s exactly what’s wrong with our country right now.” Scott Van Duzer appears to be a good man, and he is doing good work through his own foundation. He shouldn’t be catching business grief for hugging, or even voting for, President Obama. Disagree with his political views if you want — I do — but leave his business out of it. If I lived in Fort Pierce, Fla., I would be heading to Big Apple Pizza to buy a pie and show my support for the right of small businessmen to freedom of political speech and action. As a conservative, I cannot expect the same — remember the Chick-fil-A uproar — but this is a clear opportunity to “treat others the same way you want them to treat you” (Luke 6:31). Filed under: Business and Food and Human Interest and News & Politics and People and Photography and Religion Comments: 1 Comment |
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Posted on 09.07.12 by Danny Glover @ 4:22 pm
Unfortunately, Candy Corn Oreos are not an imaginary nightmare on Main Street. They are about to become a reality at Target stores thanks to some evil marketing genius with a sick sense of humor. The news is all over the Internet today, and I knew before I read it that someone covering the story was sure to use the phrase “outside the box,” which too often is synonymous with bad ideas. I’ve explained my animosity toward that phrase before. Now, with the introduction of Candy Corn Oreos, I’ve decided to revive my regular ridicule of the concept with a new feature on this blog. Consider this the first official installment of “Outside The Box.” While we’re talking about nasty attempts at sweet treats, enjoy comedian Tim Hawkins’ take on the subject to start your weekend: Filed under: Advertising and Business and Food and Holidays and Human Interest and Just For Laughs and Outside The Box and People and Video Comments: None |
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Posted on 08.27.12 by Danny Glover @ 8:19 am
Does this make you want to eat Little Baby’s Ice Cream? I didn’t think so. But it did make more than 2 million people want to watch the ad on YouTube. The ad clearly accomplished the goal of introducing more people to the Little Baby’s brand — enough of them that President Obama’s campaign paid to build a preview of its “Blatant” ad into the video pre-roll, which is what played when I just watched the Little Baby’s ad. But few consumers are likely to rush out and buy ice cream pitched as the key to “glistening skin” and “clean and clear pores.” Just the thought of eating Little Baby’s now makes my stomach turn. All I see are scary eyes and hairy cream. Filed under: Advertising and Business and Food and Just For Laughs and Video Comments: None |
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Posted on 08.17.12 by Danny Glover @ 11:09 am
Once upon a time in America, the government largely stayed out of people’s business unless they asked for help or were up to no good. Those days are over. Today’s politicians and bureaucrats — especially bureaucrats — are a bunch of nib-noses and proud of it. The latest proof: Lemonade Freedom Day, which will be celebrated tomorrow. In a country that embraces liberty and personal responsibility, why do we need a special day to defend the rights of budding young entrepreneurs everywhere to sell sweet drinks? Because nanny-staters across the country are denying them that right. The insanity hit close to home for our family last week when the Republican presidential ticket came to our neighborhood. With Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan scheduled to speak just two blocks from our house in Virginia, we expected a steady flow of foot traffic on our street and encouraged our three children (ages 7, 10 and 12) to sell drinks and snacks from our front lawn. I work in marketing, so I couldn’t resist the urge to add the creative touch to our product names. We called our lemonade “Romney-ade,” and we sold “Sweet LiberTea,” a nod to the tea partiers in town. The menu also included West Virginia’s unofficial state snack with a partisan spin — “GOPepperoni Rolls.” And for the journalists in the neighborhood who might want to maintain the appearance of objectivity in refreshment choices, we offered “Nonpartisan Bottled Water” and “Capital Cookies,” which were just Costco cookies marked up to make a profit.
The recent nationwide controversy over lemonade stands did make us wonder whether our attempt to teach our children how to run a business and serve customers with a smile might rile the local regulators. But we live in a Republican city that is friendly to the free market and we put the stand on our own property, so we figured it was legit. Just to be safe, we also told the councilman who owns a business three buildings down from our house. He didn’t register any objections. We decided to take a chance. Filed under: Business and Culture and Family and Food and Government and News & Politics and People and West Virginia Comments: None |
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Posted on 05.19.12 by Danny Glover @ 3:47 pm
We don’t want our children’s education impacted by meddling bureaucrats who waste our taxpayer dollars twice over on nanny-state dietary rules — once to fund “food police” who patrol school cafeterias and the second time to pay the fines for breaking the rules:
The principal of the school that now must pay the fine at the expense of music and arts education exposed the nonsensical rules. “We can sell a Snickers bar, but can’t sell licorice,” he said. “We can’t sell Swedish Fish, we can’t sell Starburst, we can’t sell Skittles, but we can sell ice cream, we can sell the Snickers bar, Milky Ways, all that stuff.” This is the second time in three months that school food police have made news. The first time they were caught confiscating a child’s lunch from home. (Read previous “Why We Home-School” lessons.) Filed under: Food and Government and News & Politics and Why We Home-School Comments: None |
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Posted on 05.17.12 by Danny Glover @ 1:45 pm
All-you-can-eat specials have survived the test of culinary time because restaurants make a profit from them. But eventually some large redneck with a larger appetite is bound to make a diner pay for promising an endless supply of food for a set price. Enter Bill Wisth, the 6-foot-6, 350-pound fish fan that Chuck’s Place in Thiensville, Wis., wishes it hadn’t caught on all-you-can-eat night: Picking a fight with Wisth after he downed at least a dozen pieces of fish but wanted more probably wasn’t the best marketing tactic for Chuck’s Place. The family restaurant has had problems with Wisth before. This time, he decided to protest the restaurant’s decision to try to cap his food intake. Word spread far beyond tiny Thiensville, as the story has been told by The Christian Post, Christian Science Monitor, Eater, Gawker, The Huffington Post, International Business Times, NPR, New York Magazine, UPI and many more news outlets. “I can’t believe how slow a news day it is when they’re bringing camera crews out here,” Chuck’s Place owner Ted Hagen said. “… A radio station in Toronto said they’d give me $200 if I’d let him back in and they could film him eating the fish. I said, ‘I don’t think so.’” Filed under: Food and Human Interest and Media and News & Politics and People and Rednecks and Video Comments: None |
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Posted on 02.27.12 by Danny Glover @ 11:54 pm
As I type, I’m watching an episode of “Bizarre Foods” that features West Virginia delicacies and a hunting guide nicknamed “Redneck.” He just bragged that his biggest monthly bill is his cell phone, so he’s an enlightened redneck — my kind of people.
Remember that blog post I wrote a few weeks back about eating groundhog? Thanks to “Bizarre Foods,” you now have video proof. Host Andrew Zimmern told the story of pepperoni rolls, too. But even I learned something tonight: I had no idea that some of my fellow West Virginians eat mink. Or do they? The report on the “Roadkill Cook-off” left me wondering what’s true versus what’s for show. Filed under: Entertainment and Food and History and Hunting & Guns and Media and People and Rednecks and West Virginia and Wildlife Comments: 1 Comment |
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Posted on 02.17.12 by Danny Glover @ 4:24 pm
Well, candy fans, there’s sad news in the snack world this week. It looks like the obesity mafia organized by first lady Michelle Obama to whack all the fat and fun out of American society has put a hit on the king-size Snickers bar. Mars, the candy company that makes Snickers and other delicious treats, has caved to the politically correct pressure of the food police. Come 2013, the company will stop selling candy bars that include more than 220 calories. Forget the free-market principle of supply and demand that says if customers want giant candy bars, Mars will make them. When the first lady is traveling the country to decry the “obesity epidemic,” it makes more sense for Mars to conform to an arbitrary caloric line. This corporate change of heart about sugary overload isn’t a bad thing for me personally. I’ve consumed way too many king-size Snickers bars in my life. But coming as it does amid a White House-driven campaign against obesity, and after the nanny state has taken control of light bulbs across America, it’s a wee bit annoying. It’s also a hypocritical marketing gimmick considering that I just spotted a $10 Snickers bar like this in a local CVS last week:
These developments combined have inspired me. For our New Year’s Eve party this year, in memory of the soon-to-be-smaller Snickers bars, I’m going to buy a “Slice ‘n Share” Snickers to bid farewell to an American tradition. Maybe I’ll cut it into servings of 220 calories or less in honor of Mr. Mars and Michelle Obama. Then we’ll dim all the incandescent light bulbs in the house and invite everyone to gather ’round our energy-inefficient TV to watch comedian Tim Hawkins tell us all about his dream of a “Snickaloaf.” Filed under: 1980s and Adoption and Business and Culture and Food and Government and Human Interest and Just For Laughs and Media and News & Politics and People and Rednecks and Video Comments: None |
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Posted on 02.15.12 by Danny Glover @ 11:25 am
We don’t want the government food police inspecting our children’s lunches and demanding that they eat something we didn’t give them. The story:
So according to government standards, a turkey and cheese sandwich is healthier than this? That alone is ridiculous. It’s even more outrageous that bureaucrats think they have the right to micromanage the diets of individual schoolchildren. (Read previous “Why We Home-School” lessons.) Filed under: Food and Government and Health and News & Politics and Parenting and Why We Home-School Comments: 1 Comment |
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Posted on 02.02.12 by Danny Glover @ 1:52 pm
That might not sound so bad during this winter of balmy weather, especially to skiers. But spring-loving rednecks who want revenge against the prophetic Phil and his Phamily of rodents should go here, where you’ll find a recipe for roasting your neighborhood groundhog, literally. Why would you want to eat a groundhog? Every redneck knows the answer: Filed under: Culture and Food and Hunting & Guns and Rednecks and West Virginia and Wildlife Comments: 2 Comments |
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Posted on 11.22.11 by Danny Glover @ 4:18 pm
At my wife’s behest, we bought an outdoor deep fryer several years ago for two special meals — catfish and turkey. Kimberly laughs to this day as she remembers the sight of my mother and me lighting the fryer flame for our first deep-fried Thanksgiving feast. Mom had done a bit too much Internet research beforehand and had both of us terrified of torching the house or taking out the whole family in a massive explosion. We stretched the hose connecting the propane tank to the frier stand as far as we could, and if we had a 10-foot pole, I’m sure we would have used it to ignite the gas from a distance. If handheld video cameras and YouTube had existed back then, we may well have become a viral hit, albeit in Rebecca Black fashion. Laugh if you will, but today, Mom and I were vindicated by none other than the Homeland Security Department, which tweeted warnings about the dangers of frying turkeys. The department shared this video to emphasize the warning: How encouraging to see that the bureaucrats responsible for securing our nation are so committed to their jobs that they even issue an ominous warning about turkeys possessing our fryers in search of Thanksgiving Day revenge. Filed under: Family and Food and Government and Holidays and Video Comments: 1 Comment |
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Posted on 11.18.11 by Danny Glover @ 10:55 am
And french fries are good for your health. These ideas, put forth by a Congress caving to the pressures applied by food companies, potato growers and the salt industry, are not likely to engender any protests from rednecks, enlightened or otherwise. Sure, we’ll mock the government for accepting such ridiculous health conclusions because it’s such an easy target. But we all remember pizza Fridays and tolerably tasty fries in the school lunches of our youth, and we think all children should experience those simple pleasures of life. Rest assured that we serve pizza, french fries and all manner of other unhealthy but convenient meals in the Glover Home School — and no bureaucrats can tell us to stop, even if they are so inclined. Filed under: Food and Government and Home Schooling and Human Interest and News & Politics Comments: None |
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